Adelie and Staley's World

Adelie and Staley's World

Monday, June 1, 2015

A Last

Today is my last day of maternity leave, and I'm struggling with it.  I do enjoy my job, but I enjoy being home with my family more.  I find the work I do rewarding, but the reward of motherhood far exceeds it.  I cherish the kids and families that I work with, but nothing compares to the time spent with my own kids and my own family at home.  And as much as it seems like Briggs has always been a part of our family, it also feels like he was just born yesterday.  How can 12 weeks have flown by so quickly??

Returning to work after each child has been difficult, but I'm finding this one especially hard.  Maybe it's because I know it's my last maternity leave.  Maybe it's because there have been some big changes at work that I'm not sure are favorable.  Maybe it's because we are heading into summer, and I just love all the outdoor fun with my kids during summer.  Maybe it's because my kids are changing so quickly right now and I don't want to miss a moment of it.  And maybe it's as simple as not wanting to have to set an alarm, follow a schedule, meet deadlines, and deal with stress that comes with working. 

Yes, I do enjoy my job.  Yes, the extra income is nice.  Yes, I feel fulfilled in helping others and using my skills.  Yes, it's only 2 days/week.  Yes, my kids look forward to time spent with others.  And yes, I feel so blessed that my mom will watch them one day and we've found a wonderful nanny who will watch them the other day that I work.  But today when Staley told me, "I wish you didn't have to go back to work tomorrow", I totally agreed.

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