Expectations

After years of working with children and now having 2 of my own, I have learned the value of clearly stating expectations.  At work, on day one of working with a child, I start by telling them the rules of my room.  We daily articulate to Staley and Adelie what our expectations are.  And I've found that when children know what the expectations are, they are much more likely to live up to them.

Even as an adult, I like to know what is expected of me in given situations.  At work, when helping out at church, during my children's activities.  It gives me peace of mind when I clearly understand how things are supposed to go and what I am supposed to do.  Now I'm not sure how well this stating expectations works for anything else, but since I find it so effective in my life, I'm willing to put it out there and see if it works.

I'm done with winter.  After record breaking cold and snow, winter has outstayed its welcome.  And so, March, these are my expectations for you:

1. Temperatures in the single digits or even the teens are not acceptable.  And don't even think about the negatives.  Let's shoot for some nice 50 and 60 degree days.
2. No more snow.  I mean it!
3.  Ditto for freezing rain, ice, and wintery mixes. 
4. A gentle breeze is nice, but cut it out with the high winds.  I don't want to hear any more talk about wind chills.
5.  I'm fine with wearing a fleece or a jacket, but it's time to put away the hats and gloves.  Let's work on that.
6. I expect sunshine. 
7. I expect melting snow. 
8. I expect the opportunity to play outside at least several days each week.

You are the beginning of spring.  It's time to start acting like it.

Good Point

Today we were driving home from Peoria as a family and had this conversation:

Staley:  "I don't want to be in my carseat.  I want to get out."
Me:  (Teasingly) "Okay, Daddy.  Stop the car.  Staley wants to get out.  She can just walk home from here."
Staley:  "I can't walk home.  It's too far."
Me:  "Oh, you have young legs.  You'll be fine."
Staley:  "But I have to hold your hand when I walk in the road and you're staying in the car."

She makes a good point.  I can't argue with that.

A Mind of Her Own

On Tuesday during Circle Time at Miss Meagan's house, they talked about March and what things happen in March.  On Wednesday, out of the blue, Staley told me:  "On St. Patrick's Day, I am NOT going to wear green.  I am going to wear purple because pink and purple are my favorite colors."

I love that Staley has a mind of her own.  And if you are going to take a stand on something, why not St. Patrick's Day?

Eleven Months

How can Adelie be one month away from her first birthday?  Where has the time gone?  My baby girl is growing up.  She is out of most of her 9 month clothes and is starting to wear some of her 12-18 month things.  She still wears size 3 diapers.  She hasn't been to the doctor in awhile, so I'm not sure about her weight, but I'm guessing around 17 lbs.  She's still long and lean.  Adelie has 8 teeth (and I think she's working on some more).  She nurses 3 times, eats 3 meals, and takes 1-2 naps during the day.  She sleeps for 11-12 hours at night (from 7:30-6:30/7:00).  Adelie has moved from her infant carseat to her convertible carseat and no longer uses a bottle.  She's getting to be such a big girl.

Likes:  Adelie is my happy, giggly, mischievious, active little girl.  Her current favorite activity is crawling on/off and in/out of things.  She can spend 20 minutes climbing on and off a chair, in and out of the Cozy Coupe car, on and off her ride on toy, in and out of the toy boxes or laundry baskets.  Favorite toys include her house toy, Staley's cardboard house and tent/tunnel, her ride on toy, and push toys.  (Basically any toy that she can use while being active.)  She still likes looking at books with flaps, buttons, and sounds.  Adelie remains a good eater (although we're going through a throwing-food-on-the-floor phase) with favorite foods being pasta with sauce and fruit, although she still eats pretty much anything we feed her.  She likes being around people, loves animals, enjoys bath time, and still LOVES her big sister.

Always happy to be going for a walk

Dislikes:  Adelie is developing quite the attitude when things aren't going her way.  She will let us know when she's not happy about something with her LOUD, shrill scream.  She has also started throwing little fits when she's not getting her way where she will cry, arch herself backward, and kick her feet.  She gets mad when she's hungry and the food isn't coming fast enough (or when she's thrown all the food off her tray and then doesn't have any.)  This also applies to those times when she has pitched the toys/books out of her carseat and then doesn't have anything to play with.  She can also be testy about having her diaper changed, being left alone in a room, or having things taken away from her.  And if she is removed from a super-fun activity like playing with power cords, climbing on the steps, standing on a chair, trying to eat crayons/paper/cat fur, playing in the toilet, or emptying the DVD shelves (to name a few), she will express her displeasure.  Luckily she's still easily distracted and her unhappiness does not last very long.

Skills:  Adelie's gross motor skills continue to be her biggest strength.  She is fast, mobile, and into everything.  She crawls, cruises, walks all over with a push toy, can walk across a room with one hand held, stands without holding onto anything, and climbs, climbs, climbs.  She will take 2-3 steps when walking from one person to another, but is not yet walking independently.  I think she could, but is just too busy (and fast with her crawling) to try.  Adelie is still very proficient at pushing buttons, activating switches, and lifting flaps.  She likes to color for short periods of time, and enjoys putting things into containers.  Adelie feeds herself with her fingers and will take the spoon with food on it and bring it to her mouth.  She drinks independently from a sippy cup.  She likes to 'help' by putting the toothbrush in her mouth, bringing her brush/comb to her hair, putting her bow/hat on her head, and putting her socks to her feet.  Adelie still signs 'more'.  She has said a handful of words (banana, duck, dog, yes, done, up, Papa, Mama), but Dada, Sissy, and sock are her only consistent words.  She waves, claps, gives high fives, growls, snorts, whistles, plays 'so big', blows kisses, dances (by bouncing up and down), and gives hugs.  Her smile is contagious.

Adelie loves walking with her push toys

Adelie is our little firecracker.  She keeps us on our toes, but I couldn't imagine our life without her.

My happy little girl

Adelie at 11 months

A Different Perspective

I have always been a fan of Disney movies.  Even through high school and college (and after), I would enjoy going to the theater to see the new animated movies as they came out.  Before we even started thinking about a family, I had a collection of some of my favorite Disney movies like "The Little Mermaid" and "Aladdin."  I enjoyed watching them without kids, so I knew that one day I would love watching my kids enjoy them.

However now that we are slowly letting Staley watch more and more of these princess movies, my perspective has changed a bit.  I knew that each of the movies have scary moments, tense situations, and bad guys that still give me pause.  But there are more subtle things that I had forgotten about.  I've heard words like "idiot" and "stupid", conversations about killing and death, even Ursula referring to Ariel as a "little tramp."  Very few of the princesses have two living parents.  Rapunzel was kidnapped.  Aurora was raised away from her family.  Snow White and Cinderella have evil step-families. Aladdin and Flynn Rider were thieves.  So many things that are difficult to explain to a 3 year old..

But one of the things that I've struggled with the most since sharing some of these movies with Staley is the overall theme of most of these Disney movies.  As Staley summed it up, "I need to put on my dress so we can kiss and fall in love."  When watching "The Little Mermaid" with Staley, I picked up on some disturbing themes from this teenage mermaid including:  if you don't like their rules, it's okay to disobey your parents; love at first sight will lead to happily ever after; completely changing yourself for a man may be necessary to find true love; 3 days to fall in love (without ever talking) should be more than enough; and kissing = love.  And many of the other movies share similar themes like passively waiting to be rescued by a man, falling in love with perfect strangers, or the importance of a kiss.  And don't get me started on "Sleeping Beauty".  Why on earth, when your daughter is cursed to prick her finger when she's 16 do you send her away for the first 16 years of life and then bring her home on her 16th birthday?  What is wrong with these people???

I want my daughters to grow up as strong, independent women.  I want them to know that they do not need a man to complete them.  I want them to understand that love takes time, and that kissing does not equal love.  I know there is plenty of time to teach them these lessons...but these Disney story-lines aren't helping.

Jackpot

Staley got a new carseat.  Tonight when I removed her old one from the van and shook it out, I retrieved:  two hair ties, 9 fruit snacks, enough Cheerios/animal crackers/dry cereal pieces to feed a toddler army, 7 magnetic sea creatures, part of Cinderella's magnetic dress, and 51 cents.

All in all, I was pleased with the haul.  Looking forward to seeing what Adelie can stow away in there.

She Says...

I previously posted about our new household rule that band aids are only allowed if you are bleeding.  Today Staley and I had this conversation:
Staley:  "My finger really hurts.  I think it's bleeding."
Me:  "Nope.  It's not bleeding."
Staley:  (Exasperated) "When am I going to have bleeding?"

As we were driving home from some errands this morning, Staley asked what we were going to do when we got home.  I told her it would be lunch time and then rest time.  Staley responded, "I am not hungry or resty."

On Monday when Staley woke up, it was (shocker, shocker) snowing outside.  I opened her curtains and said, "Look, Staley.  It's snowing."  Barely looking up, she replied, "When is it going to be spring?"  You know winter has gone on too long when even the kids are ready for it to be over.  Despite that, we did enjoy playing in the balmy 40 degrees we had today.