Yesterday I wrote a post. When I reread it, I can hear the frustration in my words. I know that it is an honest depiction of the crazy that I sometimes feel, but I also need to clarify: most of the time my kids are not driving me that crazy. Most of the time I can deal with tantrums and arguments and attitude and boundary pushing in a calm and rational way. Most of the time my kids play nicely together and listen and are thoughtful and sweet and polite and fun to be around. But we have those other moments, sometimes hours, occasionally days that make me the crazy Mama that wrote yesterday's post.
Someday in the future my kids may read this blog. What will they think? Will they laugh about the funny things they said? Will they recall favorite trips or activities or moments that they had long since forgotten about? Will they enjoy seeing all the pictures of themselves growing up page by page in front of them? I hope so. But more than that, I hope that they will be able to see in my writing how much they are loved. Even in my moments of frustration, my love is constant. Even when I am disappointed in their words or their actions, my love for them never wavers. My posts about the hard parts of parenting are truth. But the bigger truth is that every single one of those hard parts about parenting are totally worth it. My life is full because of Staley and Adelie and Briggs. My heart is full. My love for them is fierce and unending and no amount of crazy will ever change that.
